"Declan, don't mess with the humiliator (i.e. humidifier). ~ June 5, 2010
Shelby called from school to tell us that her ear was hurting. As she and Tom were talking, she suggested, "Maybe I have the ear flu like I did on Sunday." ~ October 29, 2009
Shelby was watching her cousin Ryan play a video game. He was trying to do something and failed, so she told him, "You got your royal butt kicked." ~ July 31, 2009
Tom was taking pictures of the 4th of July fireworks when Shelby asked, "Dad are you enjoying moments of glory?" ~ July 4, 2009
As Tom was cooking sausage, "The more it cooks, the more delisher it smells." ~ November 30, 2008
Tom said, "Shelby, you have dagger toes." Shelby replied, "And so do you and Declan and Taylor and Payden and we all keep daggin' Mom." ~ November 30, 2008
"Dad you're squeezing my leg like squeezing vomit out of a snake." (She saw it on the Discovery channel.) ~ November 14, 2008
I was trying to hear about Shelby's day at school, but was having difficulty hearing, so I kept asking her to repeat what she said. Finally, she said, "Why are you making me yell, WO-man?" ~October 6, 2008
"I gotta play an instrument yesterday, and it was magical." ~ May 6, 2008
Tom made the girls s'mores, so I asked them, "Did Dad make you a good snack?" Shelby replied, "Uh-huh. I think it's melty genius." ~ April 25, 2008
After Payden said her prayer, Shelby turned to me and said, "Mom, I just love what comes out of that little mouth." ~ April 13, 2008
"Sometimes I make tiny little whisper farts. Like fog. It's like a train puffing its clouds out without any noise." ~ March 31, 2008
Shelby was playing an Xbox game where you open crates to get money. "Mom, look how many there were in this crate. A strawbaganza!!" ~ March 1, 2008
"That one took as easy as a snap of cake ... of cheesecake I mean." ~ November 21, 2007
We were at an arts and craft show, and Tom told Shelby, "Hey, I'll show you something." "What?" "My butt." "Hey, that's not art." ~ November 17, 2007
Shelby scooped a bug out of the bathtub, so I told her, "That's a silverfish." "Did it come from Long John Silver's?" ~ October 31, 2007
Shelby read about Job in the scripture storybook and was telling me about it. "Satan tried to kill all of his stuff. Even his oxygen." (i.e. oxen) ~ October 24, 2007
"Rub-a-dub-dub. Three men in a tub. And who do you think they be? The bitcher, the baker, the candlestick maker. Knaves all three." ~ September 28, 2007
"Dad, pizza's a triangle. Pie's a triangle. Hayner's a triangle." "Don't you mean han-gar?" "No, Dad, it's hay-NER." ~ September 26, 2007
"Shelby, what did you like about today?" "I liked writing my name with pintapox." (i.e. pinto beans; pintapox came from a show called Avatar) ~ September 26, 2007
"Shelby, how do you know about DQ?" "Because I've been there before." "So, what's Dairy Queen?" "From your imagination."
"Mom, where are the zizzers?" (i.e. scissors)
"I'm rolling like a tumblebean."
"Mom, what's for dinner?" "Lasagna." "No, Mom, I think it's basagna."
